Disappointment

I felt so defeated. After all the effort I gave towards everything that I do. All of it! Now a waste.. gone!

I don't have any idea on what happen. It's very sudden. Again, I felt the feeling of being left alone, hanging in the situation that you foreseen to happen, but not. The worst, instead of being at the middle of the situation (noting that I'm halfway there and halfway way of the beginning) I was sent backwards.

There are really promises that are kept to be broken like this one. The consolation that i have now is that I am the one being considered and ask first, which I happily accepted.

This is not the first time as there are lots of same situation happened before. I don't understand why I'm still not used to it.

I am so Angry, so Disappointed!

Life Changing Story

My page was been stagnant for the past days. Due to busy and demanding work schedule, I forgot to update.

Anyway, I will post one forwarded message here.. It's worth reading actually. Just like to share to those who accidentally wander on my page, friends and regular visitors. :D

GOD IS ALWAYS KIND TO THE WIDOWS AND ORPHANS and children, in general. Let's appreciate our parents who took care of us unselfishly- who put to heart the moral responsibility of rearing God given children. And for this - it is our moral obligation to do the same to our kids.

Read on.
=====

Very touching and a great eye opener for all of us.
From a Cebuano, a touching and a worth-living story.

Ever since I was diagnosed with having a possible heart enlargement, I have followed a strict regimen of physical exercises. I jog during week days and take a long ride biking to the mountains every Sunday.

But this Sunday turned out to be a special Sunday for me. While I was on my way to the mountains of Busay (Cebu ) hoping to strengthen my heart by this exercise, I personally encountered a heart-breaking scene that changed me.

I had already passed by the Marco Polo Plaza (formerly Cebu Plaza Hotel) when I decided to stop to buy bananas at a small carinderia located along the road. I haven't taken any solid food that morning so I wanted some fruits to have the needed energy to get to my destination - the mountain top.

I was almost done eating with a second banana when I noticed two children across the street busily searching the garbage area. "*Basureros*" I said to myself and quickly turned my attention away from them to sip a small amount of water. I couldn't care less for these children, to make it straight, I do not like them and I do not trust them at all.

You see, several times I had been a victim to these children who are pretending to be *basureros* looking for empty bottles and cans when in fact the 'palangganas', kalderos', and 'hinayhays' are their favorites.

I remember one afternoon while I was watching a TV program when the screen suddenly became blurred. I checked outside and saw two young *basureros*running away with my newly installed antenna!

Hatred may be too strong a word to describe my feeling towards these *basureros*, but I honestly just do not like them. Until I met these three children.

I was about to embark on my bike again when I heard one of the two children, a girl of about 7 or 8 years of age, saying aloud to the other, a boy of about 12 years, "Kuya si Dodong kunin mo kasi tumitingin sa mga kumain, nakakahiya." Only then did I notice a small boy standing near me biting slightly his fingers. He's a few inches shorter compared to my own 5-year old son (I came to know later that he's also 5 years old).

Though he did not ask for food from anyone in the carinderia, the way he was looking at the customers who were eating was enough to convince me that he was intensely craving for food. The older boy then quickly crossed the street and gently pulled out the little one who politely obeyed. As I watched the two crossing back the street to the garbage area, I heard the tindera saying "Kawawa naman yang mga batang yan mababait pa naman." I learned further from the carinderia owner that the children were from a good family. Both parents were working before and that their father had a stroke 3 years ago and became partially paralyzed while their mother died of heart attack as their father was still confined at the hospital. The parents were still in their early forties when the catastrophe happened and the children became *basureros* since then to meet their daily needs and the cost of their father's medication.

Deeply moved by what I heard, I went to a nearby bakery and bought 20 pesos worth of bread and gave it to the children who initially refused, including the little boy. "Sige lang po, salamat na lang, bibili na lang po kami mamaya kung makabenta na kami," the young girl said to me.
I explained that they needed to go home because it was starting to rain. "Nasanay na po kami," the girl answered further.

Again, I explained that the rain could make them sick and if they get sick there'll be no one to take care of their father. Upon mention of their father, they nodded and accepted the bread but I noticed that the older boy did not eat.

When I asked him if he does not like the kind of bread I bought for them, he smiled and as he was about to explain, the little girl, who is the more talkative of them, interrupted "Linggo po kasi ngayon, pag sabado at lingo hapon lang po siya kumakain, kami lang po ang kumakain ng agahan pero di na po kami kakain pagdating ng hapon si kuya lang po. Pero pag lunes hanggang biyernes, kasi may pasok, si kuya lang po ang nag-aagahan, kami naman hapunan lang. Pero kung marami kaming benta, kami pong lahat (kumakain)," she continued.
"Bakit hindi nyo na lang hati-hatiin ang pagkain kahit kakaunti para makakain kayong lahat?" I countered.

The young girl reasoned out that their father wanted her older brother to come to school with a full stomach so he can easily catch up on the teacher's lessons. "Pag nagkatrabaho na si kuya, hihinto na kami sa pamamasura, first honor kasi siya," the little boy added proudly.

Maybe I was caught by surprise or I was just overly emotional that my tears begun to fall. I then quickly turned my back from them to hide my tears and pretended to pick up my bike from the carinderia where I left it. I don't know how many seconds or minutes I spent just to compose myself pretending again this time that I was mending my bike.

Finally, I get on to my bike and approached the three children to bid them goodbye and they in turn cast their grateful smiles at me. I then took a good look at all of them specially to the small boy and pat his head with a pinch in my heart. Although I believe that their positive look at life could someday change their present situation, there is one thing that they could never change anymore, that is, their being motherless. That little boy can no longer taste the sweet embrace, caring, and most of all, the love of his mother forever. Nobody can fill the empty gap created by that sudden and untimely death of their mother. Every big event that will happen to their lives will only remind them of their loss and make them wish for their mother's presence.

I reached into my pocket and handed to them my last 100 peso bill which I was reserving for our department's bowling tournament. This time they refused strongly but I jokingly said to the girl, "Suntukin kita pag hindi mo tinanggap yan."
She smiled as she extended her hand to take the money. “Salamat po, makakabili na kami ng gamot ni papa," she uttered.
I then turned to the small boy and though he's a few feet away from me, I still noticed that while his right hand was holding the half-filled sack, his left hand was holding a toy --a worn out toy car. I waved my hand and said bye bye to him as I drove towards the mountains again. Did he just find the toy in the garbage area or was the toy originally his -- before the misfortune struck? I did not bother to ask. But one thing is crystal clear to me, that in spite of the boy's abnormal life, he has not given up his childhood completely. I can sense it by the way he held and stared at his toy.

My meeting with those young *basureros* made me poorer by 100 pesos but it changed me and made me richer in lessons of life.

In them, I learned that life can change suddenly and just anyone may be caught completely unprepared.

In them, I've learned that even the darkest side of life, cannot change the beauty of one's heart. Those three children, who can infrequently partake of three meals a day, were still able to hold on to what they believe was right. What a contrast to many of us who are quick to point to our misfortunes to justify acts of impropriety.

In them, I've learned to hope for deliverance even when things seem to go the other way.

Lastly, I know that God cares for them. That while He may have allowed them to suffer such a terrible life, which our finite minds cannot comprehend, His boundless love will surely see them through. And in God's own time I know they will prevail. GOD BLESS!!!

Life is soo good, let's appreciate it :)

No Enough Sleep

Haven't had enough sleep this past few days for a couple of reasons..

First, I'm enjoying and killing time every night updating my MW account in Facebook...

Second, I'm browsing and re-watching movies that I already watch before. Its not my intention to re-watch it actually.. I only realized it when I'm already halfway on every story..

And last, Neighbor hopping. Two consecutive nights we and my friends agreed to watch horror movies. Thursday, we forgot to borrow an S-Video cable from another friends so we only had a long chitchat. Last night, we already got the cable to found out that the television doesn't have a port.. hahaha.

We head home around 230 am. I woke up 7am today since I need to work. I really need to have an energizer like coffee but I don't have anymore stock. I didn't notice its been a week now since my last cup. Hmmmm

We will be having a few days off next week. I don't know if we still going to "Sunway Lagoon" as every one requesting long time ago.

Crazy Day!

I got a message from a friend in Philippines saying she is scheduled to fly going to the country today. Its a sudden news that she is schedule to leave our homeland to join me here in my adopted country to work.

I wasn't informed about the schedule not until I received the message.. now I'm worrying about her stay here. It turns out that the place where she will temporary stay is not yet fixed, and no one is set to meet her in the airport.

I don't know if everything is my fault, I mean, She is my friend and I, atleast look for a comfortable place for her to stay in. I tried but I'm not lucky. In the other way around, I must blame the Agency about mishandling of her safety.. yes its a safety issue about her. And it is included in the contract that they are responsible for securing a place to stay in for all their foreign employees... or at least temporary.

The answer that I got from them when I ask is "I thought she will stay with you?"

What I stupid assumptions. My responsibility to her is minimal in compare to their responsibility. They didn't even ask me if she will stay with me nor I told them I will look for a place for her.

This is wrong...

TNT Update :D

I got my special letter from the Company early this afternoon but I'm not yet confident to wander around just having the letter as a supporting document of my being an Expat here.

I remember before that special pass given to us when our visas are being renewed was issued by the Immigration and not from the Company. But the HR assure me that this is enough basis for the Immigration police not to detained me in case I crossed their ways :D... quite convincing.. hahaha

Working Document

Really I am lost today. I forgot to ask the HR who is now working on my visa renewal to provide me a copy of a special pass. My visa is date to expired today.. :( and my passport is still at the Immigration.

Normally, visa renewal will take atleast 1 week or 2 weeks the most. Depends on how good your employer explanation on the urgency of its issuance. In my case, every thing is on rush since they just collected my passport 3 days before the last issued visa ends (note that my adopted country issued me a 1 year visa last year since my old passport will expire this August).

I just emailed our HR if they can still provide this special letter pass for me to be able to go out this weekends, else I don't have any choice but to be a couch potato again and lock my self on my place. whew.

Im dead.. really dead.

Back to Reality

Back again from the long holiday..

I still had the after effect of my last travel. I have to tighten up my schedule since one of my teammates is still on vacation. Just hoping that work loads today are minimal.. I think they are still on holiday mode.. hehehe.

I have a schedule practice later with my kicking friends in preparation for the upcoming belt grading next week. I don't know if I can join them, but I will still come for tomorrow training... I think I still need to rest... Need sometime to be alone...

I forgot that its been a while since our last badminton game... The Clubhouse management change their process again and didn't entertain us when we call them to book for a court. I will try to ask my friend to help us for this... I need to move some of muscle more.. I'm afraid that they still feel the trauma of the almost horrifying incident last time... :( It's a good preparation too since our Company is planning to hold a tournament soon... I hope I can join.

Blood Donation Drive

I just finished donating my blood.. nothing seems to changed.. how I wish sucking up your blood will get you thinner. I'm still huge hahaha.

Not the first

This is my 4th time to donate blood to help others in need. My first was when I'm still in College. I was second year then when I decided to give a part of my blood for good deeds. Then twice when I was in my former employer. My colleague's brother is ill due to leukemia (RIP). He was confined at Phil General Hospital then. Actually our blood was been used to replaced a very rare blood type that they acquired at "Red Cross". First blood transfusion to his brother is successful and was declared fully recovered by the doctor. But sad things happen. No signs of sickness. In just a flick, his brother felt dizzy and having high temperature after 10 months. Another blood transfusion is needed so I agree to donate for blood replacement again. But he cant fight enough, God takes his brother with HIM... Blessed his soul.

Then after 4 years, today, I again offer a part of my system for other. Doctor says it better since they can be replaced in weeks or months again.. so nothing to worry.

Messenger Status...

Just thought of listing down all the status messages of peeps from my Yahoo Messenger.. La lang pampalipas oras :D


Affiliate list

Mr. I - "Coming Soon..!" - A soon to be dad?
Ms. P - "The problem today is options -- you have too many of them" - A bit confuse?
My pareng Yan - "Big Ouch!" - Telling someone what should they feel :D
Ms. She - "I Love you Baby, miss you" - A mother to her son


Alipin sa Gigilid list:

mr. El - "Busssy..." - someone doing nothing.
Ms. Mel - "Yah..watta day.." - bad mood.


Big B list:

Mami D - "No dsl connection!!!!!" - frustrated
Sir Cris - "Tulog muna ulit..." - sleeping leaving his ym online.
Mr. Estee - "Parating na ang may hawak ng susi sa aking paglaya" - Playful... a man with cool mind.
Mrs. Manz - "Organic lollorosa and Romaine Lettuces for Sale!" - Business minded mommy.
Ms. Jo - " I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better everyday that it didn't hurt me when you walk away but to tell you the truth I cant find my way" - Inlove or broken hearted?
May - "You are like my own personal brand of heroin..." - just watch Twilight the movie.
Mike l - "How can you choose a one-colored world when you know that I've got a rainbow for you" - Inlove.
Ms. Ren - "Your hand leads me to the place, where I first met you face to face. I stand there in silence, and fall in love with you again and again :)" - Inlove
Uncle P - "Healing Time" - Recovering from sickness.


Big B in Mys List:

Uncle J - "Soon 2 b back home ;)" - Excited for his near vacation schedule.


Big B kahuyan:

Ms. Bebs - "Knowing is not enough, we just apply. Willing is not enough, we must do" - Thoughht she wants other to know.
Shen - "Just move on....." - Hurt?


Kabobo network:

Ms. Anna - "Why would you settle for less, when world gives you more?" - Dreaming BIG
Ms. Flower - "Sickness Strikes!!! not feeling soooo welll....." - Sick.


And

Me - "You're all I need to get by...." - Frustrated to be inlove.

____

A Poem

I had some idle time which give me some moments to create a poem...

For you

Sitting on my chair, thinking about you…

I think of something special that will leads me to you..

Ways to express my feelings and thoughts will do..

Which will make you happy as what I am too..

:)

Antok

Wlandyok.. nag momoment ako a few minutes ago at medyo na idlip ng biglang sumigaw yung manok namin...

" Lenovo Singapore Queue calls"

Kainis!

Holiday Mode

Everyone is sooo quiet these past two days. I can't think of anything to do with relates to my job. Though work load come unexpectedly any moment of the day, I still feel having so many free time towards the day.

Some of my colleagues are counting some important days(as they say). From Christmas to New Year to Salary Day. Yes! Salary Day! Funny, but now I agreed with them.. Salary Day is one of the important day these coming holiday week :D.

Another Holiday

(From Wikipedia)

"Deepavali, or Divali is a major Indian festival, and a significant festival in Hinduism, Sikhism and Jainism. Many legends are associated with Diwali. Today it is celebrated by Hindus, Jains and Sikhs across the globe as the "Festival of Lights," where the lights or lamps signify victory of good over the evil within every human being. The festival is also celebrated by Buddhists of Nepal, particularly the Newar Buddhists.

In many parts of India, it is the homecoming of King Rama of Ayodhya after a 14-year exile in the forest. The people of Ayodhya (the capital of his kingdom) welcomed Rama by lighting rows (avali) of lamps (deepa), thus its name, Deepavali. This word, in due course, became Diwali in Hindi. But, in South Indian languages, the word did not undergo any change, and hence the festival is called Deepavali in southern India. Southern India marks it as the day Lord Krishna defeated the demon Narakasura.

Diwali is celebrated on the first day of the lunar Kartika month, which comes in the month of October or November.

In Jainism it marks the nirvana of Lord Mahavira, which occurred on October 15, 527 BCE. The Sikhs celebrate Diwali for a different reason; on this day, the Sixth Guru, Guru Hargobind Ji, was freed from imprisonment along with 52 Hindu Kings (political prisoners) whom he had arranged to be released as well. After his release he went to Darbar Sahib (golden temple) in the holy city of Amritsar. There, he was greeted by Sikhs and many other people. In happiness they lit candles and diyas to greet the Guru. In India, Diwali is now considered to be a national festival, and the aesthetic aspect of the festival is enjoyed by most Indians regardless of faith."

So it's another Holiday for my adapted country. We are the only one working today. Hayyyz. Actually I'm looking forward to have another Holiday from my country before All Saints and All Souls day arrive. But I think the government will not give us a day rest. Pity :(

Idle

(fungi growing at an old table in our garden)

I have lots of free time today. I haven't received any calls for almost 2 hours.. yay!

Just to keep myself busy, I decided to scroll and view all pictures I have taken from my vacation using my new Kodak m83 digital camera which I bought a month ago.

Pain in the @%%

I don't know why people around us tend to become the worst nightmare that we will have. Kakainis, from a good yesterday to a disastrous today.

There is, a proud person who act as if he own and feed me destroy my morning. I don't really know why I am not yet used to talked to this kind of people in my 6 years on customer assistance. Maybe because I prepared my self to get more problem talking to the external and not to an internal client. Wahhhh.. this is one reason why people in my field looks older than our age.


Now I know the root cause of hypertension and headache!

Toxicated...

I really stressed myself too much this past few days due to workloads that I have. Tried to get some things to help me relax but no use.

I don't have time for things that I usually do on my idle time.. Like browsing on net, viewing my friendster account, chatting and or reading articles. This is caused of too much concern about everything inside the workplace. Wahhh!!!! This must be stop!

We are planning to have a whole body massage this weekend with my girl-friend(kaibigang babae) to distress. Atleast I have something to look forward to.

Shocking News...

Just got a news a few minutes ago that 3 of my colleagues was been sent to a nearest hospital due to a car accident. Whew! I’m shock to hear that one of them is in ICU… as in Intensive Care Unit.

Whoa! Goosebumps! You really not sure what will happen to you. Even in a split of second anything can happen to anyone. Who can tell that this three just go out to take lunch and all of the sudden you will learn that they are sent to a Hospital?

I’m praying for their quick recovery.